My mother suffering a massive stroke on the very day that my FIL passed, took us totally by surprise. There was no time to prepare for the change that we were about to see in her life. The initial prognosis of my mother walking again and returning to her home was premature. Sadly, my mother will remain paralysed on her right side and the left side of her brain has been compromised. She is now waiting to be placed in long-term care. It makes me sad that she will no longer be able to knit, to read a complicated novel, to move around as she wishes. I feel that I am finally accepting this reality but I am still missing the mother I had before this stroke. I have lost her.
We visit my mother, and hope that she is having a good day. We bring her flowers and we make her cards but it is hard to think of the hours in a day that she has to get through with nothing to do. It will be better when she is placed in the home. Then we can decorate her room and try to make it more homey. We can bring her her big albums. I am sure that she is missing her anniversary album. Right now she just has small make shift albums so she feels that we are there with her. She misses not living with my father and he doesn't like living alone either. They have lived together for almost 51 years. Now they just have hospital visits. It doesn't help that she is an hours drive away from me and Susan. There is talk that she may be moved even further away from us temporarily, if a bed opens up in a long- term home in one of the neighbouring towns. Then we will have a 1.5 hour drive. Then my father will not be able to just pop up to see her. He will be a half hours drive away, and he doesn't drive. We will pick him up on the way when we visit.
The one thing that makes me feel better is knowing that my mother always makes friends easily. She is a pleasant, caring, non-confrontational woman. She is a listener and would hate to ever say anything to hurt a person's feelings. I know that she will make new friends and this will make her life better. Thankfully her speech has improved and she is getting speech therapy to help it even further. Her ability to communicate is a blessing.
They say that bad events always come in threes. Last week, our next door neighbour passed away very suddenly. He was only 65 years old. His wife came to our door one evening. She had just left him at the hospital one hour previous. She got the call from the doctor that he had passed and needed a lift back up to the hospital. We witnessed her fall apart. We saw what would be her worst nightmare come true. All we could do was to hug her and tell her that we are right next door if she ever needs anything at any time. Now the ladies on each side of me are widows. We like them to know that Rob is here to help them with any guy things around the place. He will power wash their houses and balconies and be on duty when garage doors decide to not shut. I don't look forward to this phase of life. I tell Rob that I get to go first. In the end, we never get a choice though. I have been with Rob since I was 18 years old. I can't imagine my days without him. I don't think that I will be a strong widow like the ladies I see around me.
So, I guess no one ever promised us that life would always be fun. We still try to stay positive and find the good in each day. There is always a silver lining. We can always put things in perspective that things could be much worse. Here's what is making me happy today....
Watching Jack slowly turn brown! We have been leaving him treats of carrots. I have yet to see him enjoy one. He brings them over to my side of the condo so I can't see him from the window.
Working on my afghan.
A fresh lemon in my kitchen. The greenest and cheapest way to freshen up an un-green garborator. I'm sure these pollution makers will be out-lawed soon.
A spring towel in my kitchen!
And of course, looking down into these shaggy faces!
Before ending this long winded post, I just wanted to give a little update on how my CHA release purchasing has been going. I am failing miserably. You would think that with everything going on, I would have not bought a thing. No. I went the other way. I tried to buy some happiness. Don't we all learn in our early adulthood that we can't buy happiness? Well, I must have digressed. I did manage to temporarily focus my mind on something happy... scrappy stuff!
It is a bad sign when it is all just still sitting in bags. :( Now that I have finished my CSI assignments, I plan on breaking in to some of this stuff. I am missing my scrappy life and my blog has been lacking. Time to try to get back on track. I think a giveaway is a step in the right direction. Sharing makes me happy. Be on the lookout in the very near future! I'll try to put something fun together. It may even be something from this CHA release. After all, I have enough of it! ;)
Happy Scrapping!! Jen :)